Monday, June 20, 2011

At a Crossroads

Just yesterday I watched a great Video by Kay Arthur on the “Life of David”. Her teaching was on David and Bathsheba and even if you aren’t religious you most likely know the story, Strong Handsome King David is out on his Palace Balcony in the late evening and he sees Bathsheba bathing… he calls one of his attendants to find out who she is, the attendant comes back telling King David “she is the wife of Uriah the Hittite (one of David’s long time loyal men). David chooses to have her brought to him… and the rest is history.

There were a lot of good “Life Lessons” in this video. At several points in the story David was at a crossroads… he had a choice to make. And each time he chose poorly, from adultery to deception to murder in the blink of an eye and in the end because of those choices there was a price to pay.

I share this with you not to give you a bible lesson but to point to the truth of ‘Crossroads’. Our addicts come to them all the time. Choices… Crossroads… For some the choice began the first time they partied and the momentary choice of what they thought was “a bit of fun” turned into a life of addiction. For others there was no choice at all, they followed their Doctors advice and filled the prescription for pain.

No matter what got them to where they are now, at some point they will come to a Crossroads.( A place where a choice is to be made.) When they get there will they be able to make a good choice? Whether they do or not it is their crossroad to come to. As parents we try to get them there quicker by raising their bottom; removing them from our homes, cutting off any financial support ect. We put them right there in the face of a crossroads.

My son has asked me if I think it’s a good idea for him to head to Florida and start a new life, in a trade he loves. To leave with a friend who is 5 ½ years clean and sober. Leaving behind all the triggers that are here, old girlfriends, old friends, a town that every time he goes there it’s bad news. HE is standing at a crossroads…



My advice was simple; I told him what I thought was best, but in the end it is his choice. It is he that stands there at this crossroad trying to determine which way he will go.

I said

I will not tell you what to do here, you and only you can own your Recovery. If you go and you succeed, the sweet victory will be yours to hold onto. If you go and fail, it will be you that has to pick up the pieces and try again.

But know that with every choice there is a price to pay. Hard work for the victory or Hard work after a Relapse.

Crossroads; we all stand at them, our addicts will face them everyday… Will I use today Or will I walk hard in my Recovery?

3 comments:

  1. Good advice...but remind him...as my son taught me.
    "Where u are ..is where u are"

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  2. The geographical cure..every addict trys it. I like the AA saying "Everywhere you go, you take yourself with you."

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  3. I agree "Everywhere you go, you take yourself with you" but I also believe "If nothing changes, nothing changes".

    My son had to leave to get sober and stay sober. The triggers where all over the place. He had to change his enviornment. He's been clean 3+ years and is planning a visit home this August. I can sense the apprehension in his voice. He's bringing his partner so I trust the visit will be uneventful.

    Only the addict can judge the impact of his own triggers.

    God Bless and I trust your son makes the decison that is right for him.

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